Swearing like a fucking sailor

I checked my Twitter today and found this:

And I don't have to blur out the names because it's already public!

So Retta is an amazing actress from the TV show Parks and Recreation, which I love for so many amazing reasons. Her character is also an awesome feminist character whose virtues also include just being different from every other fucking character in sitcoms and being funny.

Not that she needs any defending, seeing how she clearly does not give a fuck, but I'm still on the side of the ladies below. And not just in this instance, but in all of my life.

Because in case you didn't know, Mormons, and well, just people in general, are super against swearing. They, like the man in this feed, seem to think that it is a moral code that needs to be followed by everyone in every part of their lives, instead of realizing that some people do not feel the same.

I've heard it all before. Swearing is a sign of unintelligence. Of the swearer not having enough creativity or a wide enough lexicon of vocabulary to come up with some better word.

 I just want to point out that those people are using replacements like "flip" and "fetch." Wow, way creative, way different from "fuck." I mean, they're obviously not coming up with things like "dinosaur poops!" or something that would actually impress me. And make me laugh.

But seriously. I'm an English major. I've probably read more than the average person times five. I can pull out Shakespearean insults (not enough to win a competition, but enough). This isn't a matter of me being uncreative or unintelligent.

This is a matter of me just liking to swear. Same goes for people like Retta. And while I will respect your wishes to try not to swear if you politely ask me to while we are together, I'm not going to stop cussing in my spaces.

Besides which, it has been scientifically proven that swear words actually register in a different part of your brain than other words, and are given a much different meaning cognitively. That's why when old people get Alzheimer's disease or whatever, they're still swearing while they're forgetting other things.

So really, there is no replacement for swear words. FUCK YEAH!